Cheesecake

Pixiv: Maid in Japan


I’d do a lot more Spring Cleaning if I had an army of cute maids. Even if I had to stay six feet away from them at all times, just the sight would raise my… spirits.

Cleaning isn’t the only option I have while effectively under house arrest, but I haven’t yet mustered up the enthusiasm to process vacation pictures, scan ancient medium-format negatives, sew a quilt, braid sword cords, update my CNC software and start cutting something useful (long list), trim the bamboo, fix some bugs in my published code, finish building the larger CNC mill that’s been taking up space in my living room for several years, etc, etc.

I’d love to get an electrician in to install two GFCI outlets (more Washlets!) and replace the old bathroom fan/lights with something made this century, but the ones allowed to remain open are pretty busy covering necessary maintenance. Lowes is open, so I could acquire the necessary tools and parts, but as with most things not involving my sex life, I prefer to pay professionals.

California isn’t quite under martial law, although sending your troops to shut down gun shops “to prevent panic buying” (San Jose, apparently unaware of the 10-day waiting period, one-gun-a-month limit, and draconian ammo purchase laws statewide) and ordering power and water cut off to any business that tries to stay open without approval (Los Angeles, second only to San Francisco in filth and disease) suggests that “slippery slope” is just a euphemism for bending everyone over and greasing them up. If in a few weeks we reach the point where Trump says “end the shutdown” and some state and local officials refuse, they’re going to be quite surprised to discover who the National Guard actually reports to.

Fortunately, I brought enough for everyone:

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3D Cheesecake 26


What better way to practice “social distancing” than with pictures of women who wouldn’t give you the time of day?

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Pixiv Champloo 10


That last themed post produced a surprisingly high rate of day-to-day repetition in my Pixiv recommendations, so here’s a random sampling to stir things up.

Day 3 of the Zombie Apocalypse Lockdown ended with The Return Of The Porch Cat; he’d been gone for over a week, leading me to think he’d either been moved indoors at his other home(s) or gotten himself hurt. Nope, I found him on top of the grill outside the front door, looking for skritches and food, in that order. He received both, and if he’s out there again this morning, I may just spend the day sitting out there with him.

It’s either that or clean the house, watch movies, and catch pokémon.

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3D Cheesecake 25


The everybody-telecommute edition.

In other news, we’re fully rebooked for November in Japan, and ended up gaining a day in Tokyo. I’ve penciled in a day trip to Kamakura and Enoshima.

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Pixiv: set them free!


Today’s easy-to-assemble Pixiv tag is 剥ぎ取りたいブラ, “bra I want to tear off”. To be followed by “cops I want to be arrested by”, “lawyers I want to defend me”, and “prison guards who won’t make me cry like a little girl”.

Work-safety is, of course, dubious.

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The half-life of Ai Shinozaki


Corona-chan kind of stole her thunder last week, but as of her birthday on February 26th, Ai Shinozaki has spent 14 of her 28 years deftly using bikinis and lingerie to turn boys into men.

Unrelated, Interspecies Reviewers first does some LARPing, and then shows what a real succubus can do to a man. We thought Crim was an angel, but it turns out he’s actually a Kewpie.

Okay, it’s kind of related.

What isn’t related is that we’re probably going to reschedule the upcoming Japan trip. Our flight into Haneda hasn’t been canceled yet (although lots of Narita flights have, likely because most of the passengers were going on to China or S. Korea), and our hotel has slashed their prices in half, but as I mentioned earlier, a lot of things are closing or already closed, and my sister’s doctor is telling her “not just no, but hell no” (recent recovery from bacterial pneumonia…).

What’s completely unrelated is that I just got a Naganadel in a wonder trade on Pokemon Home. Not obviously hacked like the level 100 6IV Reshiram that showed up a few days ago, at least, and it’s one of the few things that people are willing to trade a MewTwo for.

Now back to Ai-chan.

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Pixiv: gotta groom ’em all…


Pokémon takes place in a universe without the concept of “stranger danger”, where it is perfectly reasonable to send pre-teens out on their own to travel the world, battle other kids for their lunch money, go home with newly-met adults, and take candy from strangers. I find this innocence oddly refreshing. In any other game, you’d be asking what exactly this little girl is doing in a hotel room with a dirty cop and two hookers:

In Pokémon-land, though, it just means you’ve found the CEO’s avatar and can battle him for useful loot.

The first sign that the new Pokemon Sword & Shield game(s) would be a hit was Nessa/ルリナ, who hit the fan-sites like a leggy, barely-clad ton of bricks:

(yes, she dresses her early-teen “assistants” in the same outfit, and gives the protagonist a set to wear as well…)

But the real draw has proven to be pouty-punk rival Marnie/マリィ, who’s so popular that in the upcoming DFCDLC, you’ll be able to cosplay as her in-game:

Or in 3D, if you’ve got the chops:

“It’s a Berry tree. Do you want to shake it?”

As for choosing Sword versus Shield, there’s no contest:

This is reinforced in the expansion with Sword-exclusive Clara, who had sexy fan-art about ten minutes after the announcment ended:

Something supporting character Sonia can relate to:

Not that any character has been spared…

Warning: objects in fan-art are larger than in-game.

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Pixiv: Hippy Chicks


I hadn’t noticed the Pixiv tag 安産型 (literally “easy-childbirth type”, idiomatically “child-bearing hips”), until I added the pic of the BotW version of Zelda to my recent musing on the topic of reintegrating into society after life as a deranged murderhobo. (related: 1, 2)

The challenge with this set is not just linking to Houtengeki. 😁

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