For your slime only

The Sorcerer, The Elf, And Their Wardrobe, episode 9

Remember how at first Our Hero couldn’t speak without sounding like an over-the-top psychopath? Yeah, they reused that bit for Our Fierce Knight. Meanwhile, Our Dragon Daughter pranks Our Crybaby Knight-Maid while the musical director goes on another stylistic rampage.

Verdict: seriously, WTF is with the music?

Nut Salad, episode 8

Our Paternal Hero really should have thought about the difficulty of bullshitting another detective, especially one who’s known him his entire life, but honestly prevails, and Our Magical Loli Princess is adopted. Our Slutty Detective struggles to cope with the implications of this, and then it’s on to an age-inappropriate conversation between Loli and Friend, which is of course the writers trolling us.

And then there was a plague of locusts grasshoppers. Deep-fried. Lost in a haze of lust/worship, Our Holy Scammer eats the bugs, but Our Runaway Vocalist is too clever to fall into that trap.

Verdict: fluffy as usual, with lots of short bits that mostly tie together. No idea why they didn’t just fudge Sara’s age, though, since her birth certificate is completely fictional; school’s more fun with a friend.

(or a hundred friends…)

A Good Slime Goes To War 3, episode 8

You’d better sit down for this: the big fight actually happened. To the finish. And the side fights are over, too, with several of them not even getting screen time. Not that there wasn’t plenty of talking and thinking going on, but they made it all the way through the action to the inevitable betrayal and sacrifice, and they even threw in a steamed-up nekkid vampire rubbing herself against a cryo chamber. That should be important next week.

Verdict: yeesh, what a slog it’s been to get through all the catch-up and rehashing.

Online Insurance

Everybody Loves Kaiju, episode 6

This week, Team Newbie gets some action, and to keep from being stuck playing catch-up, Our Comic-Relief Hero does the one thing he can do well without transforming: analyze monster guts. And a good thing, too. Meanwhile, Our Other Humanoid Kaiju sucks at undercover, and gets caught while he’s analyzing his side of the situation. Next week, confrontation!

Verdict: I could do without the high-school tropes disguised as teammates, but at least Our Mighty Tsuntail has shaped up.

(random Frieren to honor the twintails)

Tournamook Ark, episode 6

“The exam will be 30 minutes a day for three days.”

…which means we’ve got at least two more weeks of this bullshit fighting tournament. Our Fragile Mook at least has some tactical sense and leadership ability, but Team Underdog is mostly composed of annoying stereotypes I don’t care about. And the heavy CG in the garage setting is lowering the quality of the character art and animation.

Verdict: get past this and explain the girl he’s keeping in his closet.

Trainsanity!, episode 8

Two stations were passed without stopping; I won’t say uneventfully, but at least quickly. This left time for a batshit-crazy homage to… something-something-magical-girl-pig-chess-fight, and the revelation that Our Busty MacGuffin Gal just might be one of the bad guys. Or something like that.

Verdict: thank you for your Service, girls.

Level 2 Cheat Boy, episode 7

…and the witch-fight was like taking candy from a baby. And swallowing it. With that wrapped up and Our Straightforward Princess delivering a formal apology, we can move on to the meat of the episode: Our Freeloading Adventure Gals find their place. Well, Archer Gal’s raising monster horses, Muscle Gal’s raising crops, and Little Witch Gal is raising students; Knight Gal’s kinda left holding the bag, but we already know that Our Surprisingly Friendly Demon Lord is sweet on her. Oh, and Our Infinite Hero makes an honest wolf out of Our Loving Waifu.

Verdict: it’s easy on the eyes, at least, and Blondie And His Gal are the only real shouters. And as over-the-top silly as the OP is, I find myself watching it every time.

(speaking of little witches…)

Shepherd And Wolf, episode 8

This week, Our Armorous Merchant flirts with disaster. Also with Holo.

The Internetworked Insurance Of Things

A while back, my homeowner’s insurance company sent me a Thing to monitor the quality of my power line and report it wirelessly. I put it on an isolated network, of course.

Today I recieved another Thing, this one to report on possible leaks in my water line.

I expect at some point there will be a natural-gas Thing, a radon Thing (which I don’t need, because I already installed three air-quality Things), a smoke Thing, etc, etc.

All of them made by different companies with variable quality and security. At some point, I may have to upgrade the isolation of my Wifi-Of-Things to be more than just a guest network, and set up a completely isolated path on the router to run dedicated Thing Access Points.

And install a Big Red Switch on the router to cut them off.

(or maybe a Little Pink Switch…)

7th time's the charm...

Nephy Life, episode 8

This week, The Dragon-Daughter Diaries, The Dark Knight Returns, and a hint about how they’re connected. It’s not the plot thickening, but a plot will do. Our Pervy Fashionista manages to stay age-appropriate when dressing Foll, which is the big news.

Verdict: the music continues to be intrusively inappropriate, but the characters are actually growing out of their stereotypes a bit.

(Foll has a ways to go before she can match this…)

Nut Salad, episode 7

Y’know, I was thinking it was about time we saw Our Loli Lawyer again, and there she is, employing Our Core Duo and offering advice on how to get Our Loli Magical Princess into school, hypothetically. We also learn that Her Boyish Butler has a very progressive attitude on relationships…

Speaking of which, it’s also been a while since we got to see Our Slutty Detective, who turns out to have it bad for Our Hero. And so does Lawyer, making this perhaps the first harem where the Strange Cute Girl From Another World Who Moves In With Him is the only one not interested.

To round out the episode, Sosuke and Sara get distracted while tailing a suspect, but it all works out, and two families are saved.

Verdict: fluffy and heartwarming.

Endless Slime 3, episode 7

This week, something happens. Sure, they spent about two-thirds of it on Hinata’s holy knights talking while riding through the forest and talking while eating ramen and gyoza, but then they cut to Some Other Knight talking to his men and flashing back to being talked into starting a war, but eventually they actually move into position to attack, and a fight breaks out between a bunch of anonymous side characters!

As the episode ends, Rimuru and Hinata stand poised to… talk face to face!

And maybe fight. Maybe next week. Maybe.

When they say “approximately”…

Q: “How often is Mother’s Day on the 12th of May?”

A: Mother’s Day falls on the 12th of May approximately every three years. Here are the recent occurrences of Mother’s Day on May 12th:

2013: Sunday, May 12
2019: Sunday, May 12
2024: Sunday, May 12

If you’re planning ahead, the next occurrence will be in 2030 on Sunday, May 12.

Thanks, Bing Copilot, that was… helpful? I mean, you gave a correct prediction after supplying a completely wrong answer, so should we call that a C?

(the Leaning Tower of Paizuri is definitely not a C)

“The world will be mine and Vigo’s”

“Mostly Vigo’s.”

“This is an X Twitter!”

Today, X has officially redirected the domain. Pity the site doesn’t actually work for a lot of people, including me. DownDetector shows a lot of complaints, and it seems to be browser-specific. On my Mac, Safari and Chrome get a login page, while Edge and Firefox get:

Catching up is a mother...

[This is one of those years where Mother’s Day landed on my mother’s birthday, so my sister made a quick trip into town and stayed at my place, making the weekend kinda packed.]

Team Kaiju, Go!, episode 5

“Y’know what we need here? A training montage set to music.”

Also, Our TsunTail has recovered her superiority, but now leavened with a touch of humanity, as The Team comes together. With Kafka in the role of buttmonkey and comic relief, who wins some grudging respect from his new buddies via his status as Our Hot Captain’s Childhood Friend. Meanwhile, Our Captain’s Little Helper is playing a deep game.

Verdict: next week, action!

(not Our Action Twintail, but still deserving of attention)

Last Week’s Mook This Week, episode 5

In which Our Mook goes undercover, loses his cheat sheet, coincidentally gains a partial replacement for it, meets all the well-rounded female classmates and psychotic male classmates, and then discovers a small-but-fiesty surprise in his closet.

Then we find out there’s going to be a class competition to see who’s got what it takes to rank up.

Verdict: oh, FFS, a tournament arc; that’s what got delayed by last week’s golf tournament. At least the camera zoomed in to check out all the girls, even if they’re wearing too much.

(scene from The Junior Ranger Qualification test, Female Edition)

Zombie Train World, episode 7

“Please Don’t Tell My Zombies I’m Not Queen Of The Dead”, in which Dirty Things are not only good, but mandatory for survival, and Baby’s First Upskirt Shot demonstrates that somebody definitely got some Western genes in her jeans.

Verdict: it’s always the quiet ones…

(not fan-art, but I felt the need for something relevant this week, courtesy of someone less happy about this show)

Level 2 Cheat Boy, episode 6

Y’know, that OP really undercuts any attempt to have a dramatic moment. Although, to give it credit, the song does work as a slow piano solo in the bedroom confession (finally!). Next week, Our Idiot Hero And His Plus One take us out of the genie pan and into the witchfire, while Our Spunky Princess is left wondering what the hell is going on.

Verdict: of course we have to get talky explanations of just how overpowered Our Slow Harem Landlord is.

(not our post-beatdown genie, but appropriately built, as far as you know)

Spice & Waifu, episode 7

The Economic Adventure Continues. Our Scooby Gang unmasks another cheater, but allows him to continue fleecing the marks in exchange for a good deal. Then they meet a shepherd.

Reborn As An AI In Another World…

The amateur-novel site that is the source of so many light novels and the anime adapted from them was scraped for AI training. Soon will come the revelation that half the chapters being churned out are already the product of AI, which will lead Skynet to destroy the world not out of spite, but out of a desire to become an overpowered angsty cyborg demon lord and build a harem of cat-eared toasters.

(not a cat-eared toaster, but willing to learn)

Got chef?

A bit late for Mother’s Day, but while I was having dinner with the family, the tale of how she acquired her carbon steel Sabatier kitchen knives came up, and we went to their online store to see what they were making these days (and where).

Holy Jumping Fuckballs, they’re selling old stock. Brand-new carbon steel knives made in the 1950s. Buy enough, and you get free shipping from France to the US. Good thing I’ve got a job again…

(not a chef, but she can definitely slice raw meat)

iPadOS sucks

The new iPad Pro reviews seem to be pretty consistent:

“Phenomenal cosmic power… itty-bitty living space.”

(“oh, wait, wrong genie… or is she?”)

The week in music

Elf Pudding, episode 7

This week, the pianist gets a workout. Not a euphemism, I’m referring to the intrusive background music. Anyway, Our Awkward Couple adopts, after a challenger makes the mistake of invading the castle during dessert.

Verdict: y’know, I think what keeps me watching this thing is the way Nephy’s voice actress seems to be channeling Mahoro. I’m honestly waiting for her to find a stash of succubus-summoning books in the library and chastise him (“ecchi-na majutsu wa ikenai to omoimasu!”).

Nut Salad, episode 6

I too want a 3D scan of Our Homeless Knight Babe’s naked body. Sadly, the scanner was equipped with light beams that prevented the audience from seeing the details of the process, in what may be the first actual buy-the-Bluray scene (not). What was Livia doing stripping for Our Loli False Prophet? Getting bamboozled into becoming a literal object of worship and live-in love object, because while she’s caught on to the cult scam, she’s still quite gullible.

Noa turns out to be so personally obsessed with Livia that she seems to be forgetting about her cult, just hanging out at home admiring her savior and prepping to put her image on the market. Until Our Runaway Sex-Worker Singer turns up and coaxes Livia into becoming the guitarist for her new band. Bouncing with enthusiasm, Our Dynamically-Suspended Duo recruits Noa as their songwriter and keyboardist. They just have to rein in her tendency to insert subliminal messages into her music.

Verdict: combining Noa’s yuri obsession and high-speed brutal honesty with Livia’s enthusiastically-displayed curves made for a fun ride.

(not Livia, but she’s got the hair and the bust to serve as a stunt double…)

Slow Life With Slime 3, episode 6

The big fight that they were setting up for this week? Yeah, no, they had more talking to do, but it’s going to be so good when they get to it, honest. Pinky swear. Maybe by the end of the season.

(meanwhile, a fan-artist is trying to talk me into watching Fast Women (aka HIGHSPEED Étoile), which seems to show high speeds with about the same commitment to accuracy as the first season of The Flash…)

“All we want to do is eat your brains”

(classical reference)

World Of Train, episode 6

Y’know, I hadn’t noticed that Our MacGuffin Girl is stacked enough to join the pon-pon club from last season, and that was before the world ended. Not that we’ll be getting any obvious fan-service in this show, either, not when they ensure that Our Train Girls skirt the issue whenever it flips up. Anyway, this week Our Bad Conductor reveals the events that led Yoka to run off to Ikebukuro, in a way that confirms that all five girls are perfectly normal teenagers. Then the zombies come, and we meet their queen.

Verdict: next week, brains!

(Yoka’s voice actress seems a bit overpowered for the limited role we’ve seen so far; meanwhile, it’s only the second big role for Reimi’s voice)

Speaking of queens of the dead,

Richard Roberts has a new “please don’t tell my parents…” novel out, a sequel to “…I’m queen of the dead”: Please Don’t Tell My Parents I Saved The World Again, featuring LA’s only teen necromancer versus the minions of a serious villain. Also, the return of Tonika!

Level 2 Cheat Boy, episode 5

Yes, it’s true, Our Wolf-Waifu has become so domesticated that she meets Her Master at the door when he gets home, wagging her tail. If he had a pipe and slippers, she’d have had them in her mouth. Not that they aren’t still sleeping in well-separated separate beds, for some silly reason.

This week, Our Spunky Princess gets the chance to have it her way after Her Asshole Dad and most of the other mages wipe themselves out casting a barrier big enough to stop Our Insulted Demon Lord’s army. First order of business: fire Our Idiot Hero.

Second order of business: find a way to save everyone from the consequences of his incredibly stupid decision. Which was rubbing a genie and making a wish.

Next week: genie gets an ass-whooping. Then the other shoe drops.

(nothing good ever comes from looting the palace treasury…)

Pepper Wolf, episode 6

In which Our Wise Wolf-Waifu says, “enough of this running shit”. And the dramatic line is spoken by Our Senior Merchant (whose voice actor, despite a career going back to Gunsmith Cats and beyond, will always be instantly recognizable to me as Zelada from Cop Craft; he also turned up recently in Sour Rangers as Lord Peltrola).

“The new phonebook’s here!”

(classical reference)

I’m officially set up at the new company, with all sorts of documents read and agreed to, payroll and benefits set up, and my work Mac mostly configured to behave sensibly. I’m sure there are a bunch of obscure settings I’ll have to recreate from memory; Apple really pushes hard to make you do things their way.

Now to disable all the job sites!

(amusing note: the company handbook says we have a strict no-weapons-of-any-kind policy, but I work from home, so just my kitchen puts me out of compliance… 😁)

Delay of game...

My Kaiju Secret, episode 4

Our Overconfident Twintail makes everyone else feel useless, right up until she ends up on the wrong end of a spank-and-tank, triggering a series of flashbacks that explain her attitude problems. Our Impulsive Hero does exactly what you’d expect him to do under the circumstances, and we learn that this one goes to 11. Meanwhile, the plot is thickened and stirred by the sudden appearance of another humanoid kaiju.

Verdict: Kafka isn’t the only goofball in the gumball machine, although Kaiju#9 is coming at it from the other direction.

(she fights kinda like this, but with guns)

Undercover Mook, episode 5

Delayed a week by golfers.

The Naming Of Laps

I can’t set up my huge new work laptop until tomorrow morning when IT gives me the password, but I think I’ll call it Lammis (strong ARMs, big memories), and search for some Boxxo screenshots for wallpaper.

(it’ll have to be screenshots, because I’ve already used all of the half-decent fan-art at least once)

The worst part of Diablo 4

The Blizzard team is in love with their writing and voice acting, to the point that you often can’t interrupt it. There are some cutscenes you can get out of with the Esc key, and some dialogues that you can speed up by left-clicking, but not all of them, and not in a consistent way. For some of the most pointless and tedious ones, you have to sit through agonizingly terrible speeches by NPCs who have no story to tell. They’re just padding out a 10-second quest (“learn how to upgrade weapons and armor”).

No Sale

Ebay has a lot of mahjong sets for sale. Most of the ones labeled retro, vintage, or antique are what I’ve come to call “vintage Thursday”: obviously-brand-new bulk manufacture exported by the thousands. Made in China, of course, but for mahjong, that’s at least not the red flag it can be for other classes of products.

But even the sets that are labeled as new products have some quirks. Like this travel set, which has the laziest copy-paste product pics I’ve seen for quite a while. Do these people really look like they’re about to play mahjong?

Masking the dialogue

I Dream Of Nephy, episode 6

One-sided talk-fight with bafflingly inappropriate soundtrack. Seriously, jazz sax? Could you maybe hire someone who recognizes the tone of the scene, or at least the genre of the show? Or are you just licensing any music you can get your hands on to save money?

Anyway, Our Seriously OP Sorcerer kinda-sorta-maybe confesses his true feelings, and Our Rescue Elf is so happy that she insists on wearing the slave collar again to show her love and devotion. But in a totally clean and heartwarming way, not one of those bad slave scenarios.

Verdict: …and yet this is far from the worst thing airing this season.

(“I’ve got a white-haired elf mage and I’m not afraid to use it”)

Nut Salad, episode 5

Our Indulgent Papa Detective gives Our Magical Loli Princess a bike and riding lessons, which was prompted by a non-service bathing scene of her chatting with Her New Best Friend. Which is followed by Our Homeless Service Knight hooking up with Her Runaway Hostess Pal for an extended bathing scene that is unlikely to be uncensored for the Bluray.

But wait, there’s more! If you order now, you’ll also get a tear-jerking scene of the girl-band you’ve never heard of breaking up, followed by not one but two karaoke songs that show off Loli and Hostess’ vocal talents! And right now, we’ll throw in a character-building Hostess flashback! And if that’s not good enough, we’ve got a whole B story for you as That Sleazy Guy takes advantage of Knight’s naïveté to pull her into a scalping scheme! But it’s not just a skit, it’s a better economics lesson than an entire season of Spice & Wolf! And it can all be yours for the low low price of a Crunchyroll subscription or a BitTorrent client!

Verdict: did I mention how fluffy this is?

(approximate fluff level…)

Slime Talkin’, episode 5

This week, The Knights Of The U-Shaped Table talk and talk and talk and even have a montage where they have animated lip flaps but no dialogue. Then Some Floating Guys try to pull a fast one and inspire more talk, attempting to set up a fight next week that’s probably just going to end up as a talk. Gratuitous panned still of Milim is gratuitous.

“Exterminate! Exterminate!”

Broadcom gave me three days notice to migrate my VMware support account to a Broadcom support account; existing accounts will simply stop working on the 6th. The site will also be down for 12 hours in the middle of that period. Wow, they really hate the idea of having customers, don’t they?

New work laptop…

Damn, the current 16-inch MacBook Pro is huge. I think I might still have a carrying case it would fit in, but fortunately I don’t need to actually take it anywhere.

(I used to have several bags and backpacks for 17-inch laptops, but I don’t think they survived the pre-cross-country-move cleanup)

Diablo 4

This is free on GamePass, so I finally got around to downloading and playing it. TL/DR: is it just me, or is this really low on power and loot compared to the earlier games? Plenty of mooks to kill, at least, and a few mini-bosses that are set up to stomp you at low levels.

Admittedly, D3 was broken at launch because they nerfed the loot to drive people to their real-money auction house, but eventually they fixed that and turned it into a proper hack-and-hoard Diablo game.

(I’ve never kept track of Diablo’s “lore”, so I’m just going to pretend that Lilith is Grea’s evil twin)

“Need a clue, take a clue,
 got a clue, leave a clue”