Kaiju Ate, episode 9

Yet Another Humanoid Kaiju shows up, this time leading an air raid on the base. The team pulls together, but even with anatomical advice from Our Transmonster Hero, it takes the upgraded power of Our Axe-Crazy Tsuntail to thin the herd with the help of Our Clever Sidekick (who is now the frontrunner for pounding her through a mattress after this fight’s over. Or the other way around; she seems the type to insist on being on top).

Meanwhile, Our Slashy Vice-Captain manages to go mano-a-kaiju with the boss monster who wants to eat him, and even seems to be winning until it goes Full ’Zilla on him.

Verdict: Big action fight with a cliffhanger? I feel a full transformation coming on next week.

(nobody does axe-crazy like Rory Mercury…)

Rangers Lost, episode 9

It’s a big battle between Team StrongJerk and Team CleverJerk, and I don’t care who wins. Maybe if they’d upped the ante by working some MCSAs into the action, showing that they know how to draw hot chicks wearing something other than clunky jumpsuits. But no, in this universe, combat uniforms are designed to actually protect the wearer from being stripped. Baffling.

Anyhoo, more flashbacks to slightly flesh out the spear-carriers in the tournament arc, while the Big Bad Boss is off licking his wounds. Our Closet Mook becomes a bit more engaged and sympathetic, but also gets tortured, so win some, lose some.

Verdict: oh, well, at least we’ll always have the OP and ED. I think I’m done here.

(with the endless garage-based tournament arc full of boring shouty idiots, I’m starting to miss these two…)

Better luck next season?

Promo trailers are starting to trickle out. It’s not looking good so far. And I’m including the fact that Slime will continue.

Not Nearly Enough Nephy, episode 11

As usual, the music knocks you right out of the story, until they resolve the leftover plot points and the whole thing devolves into slapstick. So, rather than fitting the music to the show, they eventually just fit the show to the music. Yeah.

This was not the last episode, but with pretty much everything wrapped up, what will they do next week?

Verdict: one big happy family, with terrible taste in music.

Nut Salad, episode 10

In which the camera loves Our Bountiful Knight, but the animators hate us. Our Overfamiliar Cult Leader loves her as well, but we’re not allowed to see that, either. Good thing for Livia that the figurines they’re making aren’t flavored…

Meanwhile, over in Our Loli Lawyer’s fertile imagination, Our Magical Daughter plays the cock-blocker for her plans to win the heart of Our Detective Daddy. Then she solicits the aid of her unknowing love rival, Our Slutty Detective, and gets cock-blocked again, this time by Our First Friend’s home cooking.

Gotta say, as unrequited lovers go, Noa’s definitely winning, keeping Livia as a well-fondled pet.

Verdict: they’re making it pretty clear that Livia’s nude scenes will not be enhanced for Bluray. That’s pretty much the only negative for this show, and I can only hope that fan-artists pitch in to deliver the goodies.

Slime, Interrupted 3, episode 10

After pretty much skipping over the fate of Our Holy Knight Gal last week, except to say that healing magic doesn’t work on her, I was wondering if they’d actually resolve it this time, or drag it out again. Either way, I expected lots of talking.

And we got it. Honestly, it’s amazing how Our Obvious Bad Guys manage to so thoroughly twirl their mustaches while their heads remain completely masked. Even while shouting out their invincible attacks that don’t manage to hurt anyone before being unceremoniously killed off. Then there’s more talking, and the promise of more talking next week. Oh, and a flashback to Hinata’s sad school life. And slapstick. Because nothing sets the mood like tonal whiplash.

Verdict: Oh, the hot nekkid vampire chick? She shows up covered from neck to ankle in a goth-loli dress, but at least we get to see her stripped for the hot springs bath. Self-censored. As a panned still. In a series of panned stills mostly consisting of naked men.

(there may come a time when seasons will be filled with well-written, well-paced anime; but not this season)

🎶 Fifty ways to use a schoolgirl 🎶

Every once in a while you come across a fan-artist with dedication. Like rendering the 48 positions of the “Japanese kama sutra” ( 四十八手) with high school girls and tentacle monsters.

NSFW

Trainsplotting, episode 10

The shouty went to 11 this week, between the brief family reunion and the over-extended manga parody/exposition. But at least we got Our Snapping Tan Gal to promise sexy violence.

Verdict: the manga parodies did nothing for me.

(“…and that’s the only train I’ll ever pull!”)

Level 2 Cheat Boy, episode 9

Yes, there is an actual plot now. We’ve got war, civil war, heroics, virgin sacrifices, and Our Power Couple openly discussing the possibility of producing children. Pro tip: you’ll find breeding a lot easier if you stop sleeping in beds that are ten feet apart.

Verdict: not sure what they’ve chosen as the stopping point for this, but we’re getting closer.

(needs red under-rim glasses, but otherwise an acceptable substitute for Our Demon Lord’s Jealous Little Brother’s Right-Hand Gal)

Hungry Like The Wolf-Waifu, episode 10

Finally! Although of course Holo pretends she was just teasing. Anyway, she has a plan for escaping from the debt trap, and while I think it is in fact a terrible plan, hey, at least there was some cuddling. Next week, Undercover Blonde!

(Clara isn’t the only one whose apples are the perfect size)

Kaiju-goo-goo: Too Shy, episode 8

Our Slashy Vice-Captain is as tough as he thinks he is, making for a serious one-on-one fight. Fortunately he doesn’t put the clues together in time that would have led him to switch from monster-fighting mode to human-fighting, allowing Our Hysterical Hero to escape and get chewed out by Our Collaborating Tsuntail. Then we learn more about Our Trope-Driven Teammates at the after-party, and Kafka sticks his foot in his mouth again in front of Our Hot Childhood Friend Captain.

Verdict: I still don’t have any interest in the trope gang, but the main trio is developing nicely. And I want to know why glasses-girl is featured in the end credits but has barely had any screen time.

(speaking of nicely-developed…)

Mook Versus World, episode 8

Half of the story this week is Our Angry But Trite God going on a slow, talky killing spree, but the other half is the still-going tournament arc, and I still don’t care what happens to these people.

Verdict: losing interest.

(unrelated losing heroine is unrelated, but cute)

Now Avoiding: Country Farms Fiber Care Gummies

Costco switched brands on their fiber chewables, and the new ones are so sticky they ripped out two of my crowns. Sadly, one got swallowed and the other came out broken, so that’s gonna be about $700 for brand new ones. That’s after insurance; fortunately I have plenty of cash in my HSA account(s).

Dear Max,

Check your calendar:

(the correct date in the associated email is July 5, 2024)

The Courtship Of Foll’s Adoptive Parents, episode 10

As usual, the music is hilariously out of sync with events. This week, Our Dragon Daughter reveals her discovery of her father’s horrific death while a jaunty tune plays in the background. That’s after the one-sided fight between Our Sorcerous Daddy and Our Villain-Not Knight, and Our Crybaby Knight’s revelation of friendship and commitment. And then Something Gets Loose, which inspires the music to get even less appropriate for the scene.

Verdict: there has never been a better candidate for an alternate audio track.

(my image collection is deliberately light on loli, dragon or otherwise)

Nut Salad, episode 9

This week it’s Girl Versus School, and Our Magical Loli Princess Daughter triumphs. As promised, on her first day of sixth grade she acquires four boyfriends and three retainers. Meanwhile, Her First Best Friend, who transferred to a nearby middle school expecting to be in seventh grade with her, is feeling pretty well fucked until she recognizes the signs of bullying and puts her experience to work by playing detective.

Our Girls make up, but there’s still some lingering resentment when Sara admits that she could have just faked her age, but wanted to unlock the “Grade School Detective” achievement.

Verdict: the usual fluffy fun, with the promise of nudity next week. At least some of which will come from Our Loyal Service Knight.

(non-loli princess from whom some nudity would be appreciated…)

Post-War Slime Exposition 3, episode 9

This week, it’s all about the action, as we change to completely different characters for completely different but equally one-sided battles. In other words, last week’s cliffhanger gets to hang on until next week.

Verdict: one could wish that the talking and the action were better integrated and less lopsided. Or that they’d followed up on last week’s surprise nekkid vampire.

(and they haven’t even mentioned Milim recently)

Prime Grubhub

Amazon Prime now covers Grubhub delivery fees, and is integrated for account and payment as well. The app doesn’t work if you set up the account through Amazon, because it doesn’t support using their authentication. You can either go in through Amazon’s app, or visit Grubhub’s site in a browser and request a password-reset link, converting to standard authentication.

The interesting thing is that Amazon promised this two years ago when they bought a stake in Grubhub, but only delivered it yesterday.

🎶 Yes, we have gone bananas 🎶

Unicorn Chaser

A pleasant juxtaposition found in the sidebar of a site that should only be viewed outside of a work environment, with Javascript disabled:

(that’s Aika Sawaguchi & Yuzuha Hongo above, with Miss I-Still-Got-It Ai Shinozaki below)

Apropos of nothing

Catching up on errands, and now I have this song running through my head (with apologies to Indigo Girls):

🎶 🎶 🎶
I went to the Kroger,
   I went to the Costco,
I did all my laundry,
   I ran the dishwasher.
There’s more than one task left uncompleted,
   keeping me from the barbecue.
And the less I search my porch for late deliveries,
   the sooner that I can dine.
🎶 🎶 🎶

Train, Train, Go Away!, episode 9

This week, Our Royal MacGuffin Gal finally gets some screen time, and we learn that all is not well in Ikebukuro, and while she’s not evil, she is easily influenced. Meanwhile, Our Tiny Hot Doctor manages to get more information out of Our Wibbly-Wobbly Conductor, and it seems everyone’s living on borrowed time. As for Our Map-Making Swan Boat Expositeer, who knows what’s up with him.

Verdict: Reimi’s confident self-description reinforces her resemblance to Astra’s Quitterie. In a good way. Just a few more years…

(right there with you, dog…)

Level 2 Cheat Boy, episode 8

I wish to compliment Our Knight Gal for her taste in nightmare wedding dresses. The other highlights were the return of Our Demonic Catgirl, and the introduction of Our Masochistic Succubus And Her Impatient Master. Bonus points for giving her red under-rim glasses. Oh, and Our Idiot Former Hero And His Fan-Service Object escape with a magic item that will shape their future.

And Our Spunky Princess finally made the rare-gold-coin connection and realized exactly who Our Infinite Hero is and how badly her kingdom treated him. Not to worry, though; they’ll patch things up to the point that eventually she ends up banging Flio and Rys’ son. (wolf-kin mature quickly)

Verdict: believe it or not, there’s major plot-work on the way.

(not quite a demonic catgirl, but second-stage Leoparde will do in a pinch)

Wolf At The Door, episode 9

Sometimes investments don’t work out, something Our Clever Merchant just learned the hard way. Now there are two disappointed girls running around, and he has two days to fix everything.

(“Dear Lawrence, never snap at a woman who bites”)

Everything wrong with America’s Test Kitchen in one sentence

“To rework taco salad to be more nutritious but still hearty, we replaced the beef with quinoa.”

Once upon a time, Cook’s Illustrated was focused on perfecting recipes. Now they’re just fucking with you. And selling dozens of mildly-varying copy-pasta cookbooks. Many of the product reviews are still useful, but even those show clear signs of “marketing interference”.

Also, their app (which is easier to use than their cookbooks) is shoddy as hell, frequently failing to connect to their back-end auth server, and requiring a force-close to refresh content. Come on, it’s not like it’s much more than a wrapper around a webview.

In unrelated news, xTwitter has quietly fixed the broken-browser issues they created with the switch to the new URL; or else the browsers stealth-updated their site-compatibility fixes; or both. But it still defaulted to the unreadable “dark mode” on the same browser where I’d already fixed it once, sigh.

Hot Kaiju-On-Kaiju Action, episode 7

Our Loyal Sidekick and His Shark-Toothed Frenemy learn that Naughty Kaiju Number 9 can kick their asses with one hideous mutated hand behind his back, while casually blocking their comms. Fortunately HQ eventually notices that their vitals went offline, which clues in Our Fully-Tamed Tsuntail and Our Transforming Hero, leading to a one-on-one battle where the good guys win… until the moment that the other good guys butt in. Next week, Our Slashy Vice-Captain wants a turn. With the wrong humanoid kaiju, of course. Oops.

Verdict: drop a few quarters in the “I must get stronger” trope jar…

(Kaiju #44DD was captured and held for “research”)

Mook Versus World, episode 7

In which Teamwork Is The Key, but not that teamwork, the other one. Meanwhile, the fundamental premise of the show is undermined by Our Closeted Mook; not Our Undercover Protagonist, the other one. And then Our Hidden Boss gets to work purifying the place, reminding us that whatever their flaws, Our Color-Coded Anti-Heroes are probably the lesser evil.

Verdict: well, I did ask them to explain Closet Girl and interrupt the tournament arc…

(credit where it’s due: I really like the OP and ED)

(teamwork FTW!)

Diablo 4, Season 4

Much more Diablo-y than season 3. The loot cleanup makes things a lot easier to work with. I haven’t seen the “endgame” (level 88 autoboom necromancer has gotten the farthest), but being able to jump into Helltides at level 1 gives instant shoot-and-loot satisfaction. All solo, of course; none of my friends are playing.

Number one cause of death is “standing in ground effects that you can’t see because there’s so much going on”. So, y’know, the usual for Blizzard.

Autoboom = Ring of the Sacrilegious Soul, which automatically respawns and heals your minions and automatically blows up corpses; combine this with bonuses on number of minions, explosion damage and radius, etc, and you basically just run around in circles while things die; pushing buttons is for boss fights only.

I tried to make a second necromancer using just blood skills, but struggled with damage until a pair of gloves dropped with Blood Boiling Aspect on them. It didn’t sound like much from the description, since Overpower damage is poorly explained and hard to see happening, but combined with skills and items that produce guaranteed Overpower damage, it’s just as ’splodey as the ring, and more predictable.

Also quieter, since Corpse Explosion is mixed way too loud, to the point that a series of screen-clearing explosions is like standing next to someone shooting a magnum pistol.

Second necro just finished the story, which I had gotten about halfway through as a rogue before the season changed. TL/DR: approximately 1/3 of the playtime is spent listening to unskippable cutscenes, dialogues, and walk-and-talks; another 1/3 is spent listening to skippable ones. There appears to be no logic as to which ones can be skipped by holding Escape or clicking through.

The Sorcerer, The Elf, And Their Wardrobe, episode 9

Remember how at first Our Hero couldn’t speak without sounding like an over-the-top psychopath? Yeah, they reused that bit for Our Fierce Knight. Meanwhile, Our Dragon Daughter pranks Our Crybaby Knight-Maid while the musical director goes on another stylistic rampage.

Verdict: seriously, WTF is with the music?

Nut Salad, episode 8

Our Paternal Hero really should have thought about the difficulty of bullshitting another detective, especially one who’s known him his entire life, but honestly prevails, and Our Magical Loli Princess is adopted. Our Slutty Detective struggles to cope with the implications of this, and then it’s on to an age-inappropriate conversation between Loli and Friend, which is of course the writers trolling us.

And then there was a plague of locusts grasshoppers. Deep-fried. Lost in a haze of lust/worship, Our Holy Scammer eats the bugs, but Our Runaway Vocalist is too clever to fall into that trap.

Verdict: fluffy as usual, with lots of short bits that mostly tie together. No idea why they didn’t just fudge Sara’s age, though, since her birth certificate is completely fictional; school’s more fun with a friend.

(or a hundred friends…)

A Good Slime Goes To War 3, episode 8

You’d better sit down for this: the big fight actually happened. To the finish. And the side fights are over, too, with several of them not even getting screen time. Not that there wasn’t plenty of talking and thinking going on, but they made it all the way through the action to the inevitable betrayal and sacrifice, and they even threw in a steamed-up nekkid vampire rubbing herself against a cryo chamber. That should be important next week.

Verdict: yeesh, what a slog it’s been to get through all the catch-up and rehashing.