Every once in a while, Chinese companies selling direct on Amazon manage to amuse me. Sometimes it’s with their Boggle-dice fly-by-night company names, but usually it’s their “missed it by that much” English…

“The cover will protect your stuffs from rain or dust, you can easily remove it when you don’t wanna use the cover.”

Interestingly, the body copy further down is all much cleaner English, from a company claiming to have been founded in San Jose. So there’s a bit of a disconnect here.

Do you have an oooooh button?

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If it works with catgirls, this man is my hero.

Even if this were being used metaphorically, I’d still have to call fail on filing “Ninja Skills” as a self-help book:

In related news, Steven Turnbull has disowned his earlier gullibilityshallow scholarship on the subject and written a new book that straightens out the mix of history, pulp fiction, and wishful thinking that created the myth of Ancient Ninja Secrets. Good stuff.

The Japanese remake of Charlie’s Angels was cut short when Mamiko Asō (center) accidentally blew her right ear off while shooting this promotional picture. (not really)

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Even after this incident, her backup singers were a bit confused on the concept of gun safety…

First known photo of Masaaki Hatsumi, inventor of ninjutsu.

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🎶 🎶 🎶 🎶
Florida Man, Florida Man,
Makin’ fake bombs in a stickered van.
What’s his cause? It’s not important.
Florida Man.

Is he for Trump, or is he a mess?
Is he a tool for the yellow press?
Was his timing coincidence?
Florida Man. Florida Man.
🎶 🎶 🎶 🎶

Can I have the Chilly Girl with extra Cutles?