It’s father/daughter detective week, with Luomen and Maomao finding puzzle pieces in different places. Which puzzle? The big spoilery one that’s been building up since early in season one. They held back one last secret for next week, but once that cat’s out of the bag, it’s showtime.

…and if you’re not current on the show, beware major, major spoilers anywhere it might be discussed. Including new fan-art.

Unrelated, Gate manga volumes 20-21

Released together last week: 20, 21. I still think it’s a shame the light novels were never officially translated (and for a long time, the most complete English fan-translation was based on the Chinese translation), but at least the manga is now well past where the anime ended. Story-wise, it’s moving into the endgame.

Update: just noticed that Robo-Ho's last name is "Agatsuma" = 我妻 = "My Wife". Subtle!

Clueless Crafter, episode 5

You know the drill: something amazing happens that turns out to be Our Clueless Hero’s work, and when asked about it, he says, “oh, that used to happen all the time in my home town”. Other than that, there are three things of note about this episode:

First, Our Hot-But-Evil Priestess meets up with Cardinal Goldfinger and gets handed over to a demon to participate in the latest assassination attempt against Princess Goofy Eyeballs. Second, Kurt forges a shortsword for Princess that you just know is going to go off next week and do something ridiculous. Third, there’s no sign of Our Mysterious Bandana And Her Watchful Bandana; guess she really did leave town to go report to his home village at a “what could go wrong” dramatic moment.

Verdict: I’m guessing the skeleton army came out of the Princess-face-drawing budget, because she looked really horrific in the close-ups.

(unrelated princess is unrelated, not deformed)

Robo-Ho, episode 4

“Normally I wear protection. But then I thought, when am I going to make it back to Haiti?” (classical reference)

This week, after Our Observant Hero wakes up with an obvious stiffy, Our Loosely-Coupled Robo Gal asks to take a peek. Rejected, she heads out to pick up a loaner school uniform from a friend, dragging him along. She initially plans to go out in just her “body paint”, until he manages to talk her into actual clothing. His, which inexplicably fit, although they’re much more flattering on her.

Convinced that it would be too suspicious for him to be seen in public with her, he tries to disguise himself and ends up looking and acting like a stalker. Compounding his bad idea, she decides that while waiting for her friend to show up, she’ll test how well her repairs are holding up. They don’t, and just as the friend arrives, he carries her off to the nearest private place to make repairs, which of course results in dialogue written to be misinterpreted as she comes to the rescue. We even get a “wrong hole” joke, despite the clear evidence that there’s only one place to stick the leg joint.

Given the fact that Gal’s Pal is running around with a stun-gun in the credits, this is clearly not the last time there will be such a “misunderstanding”.

Verdict: trash and proud of it.

Slime-Killing Witch 2, episode 4

Another member of the first season’s extended family returns and learns of last week’s mysterious character introduction, triggering a gold rush on Best Gal Beelzebub’s land. This forced the character designer to come up with dozens of new witches, which is never a bad thing. Our Most Wanted Legal Loli joins the cast and dispenses her wisdom in return for protection from being carved into tiny pieces and turned into snake-oil pills.

Verdict: the platonic harem grows again, this time literally. And we get a nutritious side dish of Beelzebub’s Whipped Witches, which could be a totally different show.

Bumpkin & Harem, episode 4

Wow, they really spent a lot of time painting that griffon. Even more than they spent drawing that triumphant ass-shot of the redhead. Pity we didn’t get to enjoy it longer, not that I’ll complain about her well-exposed tits filling the screen; that top must be reinforced with some serious magic to hold together during her acrobatics. I do have some questions about the choreography of the fight, though, as well as that whole “running on lava” thing. And the hanging-on-for-dear-life flight scene. And the way momentum is not really a thing in this universe.

With Our Misunderstood Hero’s sword broken in the fight, Strong But Tiny Haremette #2 takes him to her favorite blacksmith, where he tells her she needs to grip something longer and thicker; later, he gives her a few private lessons. Of course Thirsty McWhiteHair blew off work and tagged along, and for more fun, they were met by SweetCheeks O’RedHair, who insisted on taking care of his sword personally.

Finally, we get our first glimpse of Blue-Haired Fiery Gal #5, who looks a little light in the chest for a haremette, and we’ve already got a Legal Loli. More of her next week, it seems.

Related, I skimmed the previews of the translated light novels, and it seems he never gets anywhere with His Frisky Former Students, despite their obvious interest and their service-friendly fashion sense. He does go out on a date with an age-appropriate teacher at the magic school at one point.

Verdict: it doesn’t look like there’s much chance of getting the gals to a beach or hot-springs resort, but they do love their close-ups.

(Toxico is unrelated, Best Girl)

A-Rank Adventure Harem, episode 15

This episode was brought to you by The Principle of Conservation Of Assholes, in which assholes cannot be created or destroyed, simply transformed into other, worse assholes. Seriously, can these people write a villain who doesn’t stand around monologing while licking things? I mean, I can’t complain about Random Spear-Carrier Miniskirt Witch getting wrapped up in tentacles, that’s just good clean fun, but Our New Party Of Assholes is all about the licking, and they’re not even putting up enough of a fight to earn it. Sure, Our Adventure Gals run away a bit frantically before turning the tables, but the fight choreography is… not good, even after the assholes are replaced by Undead King Twirler. Only the mild fan-service saves it from being completely wretched.

Worse, after the exposition-heavy semifinals are over and hugs are delivered (with the promise of Special Catgirl Nene Time after it’s all over), Our Harem Hero suddenly realizes, based on no evidence that’s been shared with the audience, that The Golden McGuffin that they need to destroy to save the world is none other than… Original Asshole Party Leader!

Which, metaphysically speaking, means that everything bad that ever happened to one of the many worlds ruined by Golden McGuffin A-Rank Asshole is actually Yuke’s fault for cursing him with immortal suffering. Just sayin’.

Verdict: my brain really hurts now. They’d better make up for this with some major bath scenes, with Our Little Blonde Titty-Witch included, or I’m done.

(cat-ears leak worse than haircolor and elf-ears)

Unrelated, Shattered Space ain’t worth it at half-price

Bethesda delivered some major DLC for Skyrim and Fallout 4, but Starfield? Nah, it’s crap. A shitload of infodumps about the snake-cult-in-space faction that’s just been a bunch of mooks to shoot up to now, and we end up actually learning very little about their history and culture. But we spend way too much time sitting through conversations to get those scraps.

In a lot of ways, it reminds me of the least-entertaining part of Fallout 4‘s Far Harbor, in which Boss Synth tries to convince you that you’re not a real human either, and you’re not allowed to give any answers that flatly contradict his bullshit. It also feels quite derivative of two core quest chains in the base Starfield game.

I got this for $15 through the MS Company Store, and I feel like they charged $10 too much.

Slow buildup to major plot advances, as her uncle/foster-dad’s return to the rear palace gives Maomao some new pieces to add to the puzzle, and her father gives us a subtle hint about what’s really been going on all along. Now Jinshi’s a man with a mission.

And from now on, everything’s a spoiler.

Nice to see the franchise is doing well. Now where’s that second season?

Lazarus can stay dead

I saw that Hulu apparently has the subtitled version now, and I still have an old Hulu account, which I haven’t used much since the first season of Loser Ranger. I figured at some point I’d have to either cancel it or convert to a merged Disney+/Hulu/whatever account now that they’ve been integrated into that shitshow.

I logged in, I clicked on Lazarus, and it told me I’d have to upgrade to a premium account with Disney+, ESPN, and Live TV, for $87.99/month, and that’s with ads. I am not making that up.

Also, not happening. Ever. Hulu was already a marginal service, and I actively do not want any of the other items in the bundle. So I guess it’s time to cancel that sumbitch for good.

Based on this week’s dénouement, the people responsible for this show have never watched a detective show. The staging, the music, the dialogue, the posing, the voice acting, it’s all trying to build up a dramatic scene by replacing detective work with two people competing to as-you-know-Bob each other in front of Our Motionless Cyberdiving Inspector. I mean, nothing says “tense standoff” like a panned still of the hallway outside while random riffs compete with the voices for your attention. And where’s Our Insightful Robo-Assistant? Out cold in a tank; he’s just evidence this week, not a character.

I didn’t finish this episode.

Parsed this wrong at first…

Reborn As A Vending Machine 2 in July

Okay, now I’ve got a third show to watch next season, alongside Call Of The Night 2 and Kaiju No. 8 2.

(I used up all the good fan-art from this show last time, so I’ll be downloading LoRAs to try out)

(classical reference)

Clueless Crafter, episode 4

We’re holding at two haremettes (Thirsty Princess and Miss Adventure), with Adventurous SideTail being deeply suspicious of what’s going on, even after the explanation. It takes seeing the results of his construction efforts for her to grasp just how over-powered and innocent Our Clueless Hero is, and she’s too boggled to fall for him like the other two.

Which is refreshing, because SideTail is also the most attractive of the bunch. She’s giving off a kind of grown-up-Misty-dressed-like-Ruby-Roundhouse vibe, and her reactions to the insanity around her are sensible.

The Mysterious Bandana And Her All-Knowing Bandana show up to pull some strings and take care of the louse who betrayed SideTail’s party, only to be surprised that Our Gym Leader Oddly-Dressed Court Mage has some strings of her own. We’re left with an ominous look at The Hot-But-Evil Priestess from Kurt’s original party, who’s apparently in a bit of a pinch.

Verdict: you really have to be in the mood for this show, since the OP hits just keep coming.

(Atelier Thighza is unrelated)

Robo-Ho, episode 3

This week, Our Ignorant Robo-Slut escalates the situation by tackling Our Reluctant Hero in the bath, giving him a close-up view of Silicon(e) Heaven (classical reference). In exchange, she gets her first look at uncensored boyhood, reveals that her AI is just as prone to hallucination as an LLM, and begins working his crank in wrong and painful ways. She loses her head as he attempts to flee her increasingly dangerous stress-testing, and then loses her head. And a leg; seems he needs more practice putting Humpy back together again.

Looks like I jumped the gun by expecting a lingerie and school-uniform parade this week. I guess she conveniently got blown up on a Friday night, and they have all weekend before their classmates find out.

(study-buddy is unrelated)