Meet Ren. She’s an alien slave girl with a brain the size of a walnut and a heart the size of, well, something big and chest-related.

This is one of the postcard-sized bonus items included with the deluxe edition of the DearS PlayStation 2 game. Notice anything odd about it, besides her rather distorted anatomy?

Let’s take a closer look:

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Here’s what I like to imagine Stephen’s post-stroke physical therapy is like:

Yes, the ultimate panty fight will be live on stage in Tokyo from November 30th to December 9th, with the role of Hakufu played by a talented thespian most recently seen here hawking whipped cream and jello, Shizuka Nakamura.

A modest sample of Shizuka’s qualifications for the role is presented below; more here, if your heart can take it.

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When engineers sleep,
catgirl breeding runs amuck;
Steven, get well soon.

Also:

…with boobie mousepads and naughty hug pillows. I confess I’m just glad that they’ve left Silica-chan out of it for now. For now.

That’s not the only Asuna merchandise available, of course; you can get figures and coffee mugs and cellphone straps and keychains and iphone cases and posters and coasters and throw pillows and t-shirts and dog tags and cosplay outfits (starter, endgame, and post-Fairy Dance) and sword and wig and tote bag and wtf is all this shit?!?.

Okay, sorry, had to get that out of my system. I wouldn’t object to the Immortal Object t-shirt, though, if it came in XXL (which, being Japan, it doesn’t).

Bodacious Space Pirate merchandise, that is, including a calendar and your very own 1/1300-scale Bentenmaru.

[Update: in vaguely-related news, AsoIku book 16 came out last week. I really need to catch up on these.]

If the anime concludes with the Fairy Dance arc, as it appears it will, I will be very disappointed if it doesn’t snow in the final scene.

(based on comments about how it ends and the presence of Kanae Itō in the cast…)