January 2016

Self-promotion


Hoharu wants to let you know she has a new DVD out. I approve of this use of Twitter as a marketing tool.

Hoharu at the beach
Hoharu car wash

Sailor Suit and Machine Gun, The Movie


Coming soon, to a shooting range near you.

Sailor Suit and Machine Gun

(official site)

Holiday In Review, Food Edition


As I mentioned earlier, it was nice having parents and sister for the holidays. The three weeks of cleaning and maintenance before they arrived were a bit frantic, though. And my fridge, freezer, and pantry are pretty darn stocked for a while; I kept telling them that if they didn’t eat a lot, I wouldn’t have to shop until Valentine’s Day.

Still, even with the place stocked up, we made some outings, in which we discovered such things as Envy apples (tasty, long shelf life, doesn’t brown when left out), Robata Grill Japanese restaurant in Carmel (terrific karaage, and how can you go wrong at a place that sells baconmaki appetizers?), and something I can’t link to, the Stonemill Kitchens Pretzel Bread Ring, which appears to be a Safeway-only item so exclusive that Stonemill’s web site doesn’t acknowledge it yet. And every time I buy one, the clerk is shocked that the store has such an item.

Also, not a new discovery, but we recommend Jamie Oliver’s Beef and Guinness Stew with Dumplings, although you probably want to increase the quantity on the stew; the dumplings absorb a lot of liquid. Also Vicolo Corn Meal Pizza Crusts, which I stocked up on for quick dinners.

Seira Jōnishi


My first reaction to this picture of 19-year-old Seira Jōnishi (上西星来) was to search on Amazon Japan for photobooks and DVDs.

Seira Jounishi

My second reaction was to Google for more pictures, because she doesn’t have any photobooks or DVDs yet, and her idol group Tokyo Performance Doll has blocked international viewing of their (forgettable-but-decorative) music videos. Her 20-year-old cousin Kei (上西恵) only has one photobook, despite being an NMB48 member for five years. Clearly there’s an opportunity for a double feature here.

Dear Jack Burton,


You really shouldn’t carry your knife that way.

Big Trouble abroad

The Rock’s proposed remake is apparently still in the concept stage, and I hope it stays that way.

(for some reason, I now hear Edith Bunker’s voice singing “Mister, we could use a man like Ol’ Jack Burton again…”)

Agent Carter


Thanks to Christmas and my Amazon wishlist, I finally got to see the Agent Carter series. My DVR had skipped the first episode, and I never got around to watching it any other way, so the Bluray went onto my list. Well worth it, and now I can watch season two in two weeks.

…unless my DVR flakes out, of course.

Got RSI? Want some?


Ultimate RSI keyboard

(via)

Prediction


After the events of New Years Eve, future “slutwalks” in Europe are going to look like NRA conventions.

Glamour Photography Tip


If your model ends up looking like a RealDoll or the setup for Chobits, you’re doing it wrong.

Gravure or Chobits?

Also, go easy on smoothing out her skin with filters and photoshop until she looks like plastic. The Uncanny Valley is a two-way street.

(NSFW)

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Seems legit…


Lazy spammer

On second thought…


First response: this picture of Maria Makino makes me want to find more pictures of her.

Second response: her Wikipedia entry makes me want to wait a few years before I do that image search. Idols really need warning labels.

But what I want to know is…


…what’s so different about charm?

Mixing scripts in Bomb

Bomb magazine has been around for quite a while, as this cover from 1984 shows. The thing I find most striking about it is that all of the photoshoots have English titles, but only one is written in Katakana: “charm color”.

Now add a Wave Motion Gun…


Funamori Yamato

(via)

Rena Matsui’s Pet Rock


Rena Matsui pets rock

For some reason, people rarely take pictures of this Maneki Ishi from an angle that shows off its resemblance to a cat in the classic pose.

(via)

Of course, I’m less interested in the rock than in petting 24-year-old Rena, now “graduated” from her idol career…

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An odd day


First I get a phony cruise offer on my cellphone (which has been on the national do-not-call list for years), then I get a call from an annoyed woman asking why I called her cellphone. It seems the cruise-spammer is faking caller-id using the same list of numbers it’s calling.

The polite young black man in a three-piece suit peddling The Watchtower almost didn’t register after that annoyance.

Forever alone…


NSFW after the jump.

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Spots


Spots in the wild

Cultural Appropriation


Last seen showing off practical applications of Ribbon Theory, here’s Doctor Nekomu Otogi, NSFW, demonstrating the proper technique for respectful cultural appropriation.

A nice figure


Kitakami figure

(via)

No comment needed…


4839706bd806cef4ddb4703342cb83de

(via)

When he’s not dressed as Santa…


…the Colonel takes on other roles.

Kentucky Fried Dragonball

House styles


Nanase Otoha

The most interesting thing about this picture of Nanase Otoha (乙葉ななせ) is that I instantly knew that she was a porn actress. There were no clues on the Tumblr I found the picture on, and I’d never seen her before. There’s just something about the lighting and styling that I can’t quite put my finger on that gives it away. Not the first time; about once a week, I find a photo of a fully-dressed, attractive young Japanese woman and know that it’s from a promo shoot for a porn flick.

Cheating fate


What to do when your fortune cookie says “You will become a crazy cat lady”.

Crazy cat lady in training

Warning labels


In addition to the kanji 「歳」 preceded by a number, there are some other clues that a pretty young model is actually a dangerously-young model. In a video store, for instance, the “U-15” section will be chock full of 15-and-under girls, and as the shelves fill up, you may even find a separate (squick!) U-12 section (or their equivalents “JC” and “JS”). U-17 seems quite innocuous by comparison, especially when attached to the formidable figure of Natsuki Sawada.

Natsuki Sawada at 17

(via)

And in a rare case of a number making it easier to ogle, there’s Nana Hiratsuka’s 30+α Bluray release.

Red half-rims…


One for Steven: a live-action spotting of a cute Japanese girl wearing red half-rim glasses. Only the glasses, so NSFW after the jump.

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So long, and thanks for Fish


Rest in peace, Abe Vigoda.

“Dear 2016, please stop killing off the good ones.”

Food fight!


Or more precisely, “utensil fight”. This is a much more entertaining use of Misa Etō and Yūri Saitō than the typical Nogizaka46 video…

Food fight: Yuri Saito and Misa Eto

(via)

Duck!


If I were packing for a glamour photo shoot, I might bring along a pair of cat or bunny ears, but as this shot of Ayaka Sayama demonstrates, Japanese photographers cover all bases.

Ayaka Sayama

(via the giant sorted collection of girlie pics at 大盛りあがりグラビア館)

This will not end well…


Schoolgirl versus sacred deer

(via)

“Need a clue, take a clue,
 got a clue, leave a clue”