Available at J-List. Not available: exhibitionistic motorcycle-riding alien catgirl goddess. Good luck sourcing that component.

So, I stumbled across a Japanese phrase I hadn’t seen before, which wasn’t in any of my dictionaries. From the NSFW context (picture after the jump…), it was modern slang associated with the sex trade, but what did “kami-machi” really mean?

A quick google found a story on a “naughty Japan” site (so, NSFW link, y’know) that cleared it up: runaway and homeless young women who are willing to put out in exchange for dinner and a night in a warm bed.

This is one of those things where you can’t really be sure how much of it is true, how much was invented for dirty books and movies, and how much is “hey, check out our Wacky Japan Site”. But it rang a faint bell, and sure enough, I blogged about this sort of arrangement four years ago, back when I still got tons of spam in Japanese. It didn’t use “kami-machi”, but the subject line was “please become kami-sama to needy girls”.

Anyway, the porn industry certainly pretends it’s a real thing, and promises some first-rate talent (NSFW):

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And in unrelated news, may I say that I like the happy ending in this story from Nashville?

The Lawson convenience store chain is everywhere in Japan, and this isn’t the first time I’ve seen it spoofed for a massage parlor. Comparing prices, either this place has higher-quality service, or ¥8000 doesn’t go as far as it used to.

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Am I correct in assuming that someone was fired for not stapling a rhinestone-studded feather headdress to 15-year-old Rikako Sasaki’s head? The outfit just looks incomplete without one.

(via Takitumblr, which includes shots of what was considered matching footwear…)

When my family was visiting back around Christmas, I whined a bit about the previous year’s gift of a full set of large, heavy dishes to replace the lightweight, indestructible Corelle Ware that I was quite fond of. Not just because I didn’t need more dishes, but because I was already low on storage, and my brother had finally sent me my grandfather’s full set of monogrammed bar glassware. I said “what I really need is a good sideboard”, and twenty minutes later Mom called me over to show off several options she’d found on Wayfair.

The Parisot Ethan 6-footer was the one that fit best into the style and color of the rest of my kitchen, and they said it would be in stock on January 9th. So I figured that a few weeks into the new year, I’d have a place for my stuff.

Then the in-stock date got pushed back a few weeks. Then a few more. Then a few more. Finally, at 11:40am on April 1st, I received an in-stock email from Wayfair. At 7pm, I noticed the notice, placed the order, and was told it would ship on the 5th and arrive on the 12th. On the 5th, the ship date was revised to 5/16. On 5/17, the ship date was revised to 5/31. Mind you, I was billed on 4/1.

On the morning of 6/6, FedEx rang the bell and dropped off two large boxes containing a flat-packed sideboard and a small assembly pamphlet. (fortunately, Wayfair had a PDF of the assembly doc online, so the extent of the work required was not a surprise)

The “open first” box contained the instructions and a bag of parts. After carefully sorting and counting, I confirmed that they’d gotten it right:

(not pictured: drawer sliders, glue, and actual furniture components)

I did have to run out for replacement wood glue, though. The bottle I had was really old, and one of the two little tubes they shipped was punctured by a screw. Note to Parisot: next time, put the pointy things and the liquids in different baggies.

They estimate two hours, but I suspect they don’t include unpacking and sorting in that…

[Update: and done! Except for leveling the doors and drawers. And moving the bookshelf full of cookbooks that’s sitting where it needs to go. Etc, etc.]

Back in the days when the Star Trek franchise allowed a lot of room for creative novelists, Diane Duane penned a series of extremely popular novels about the Romulans. The omnibus edition of all four is $3.99 right now. Book five, written much more recently, is $8.99, but given the steep discount on the first four, who cares?