“He doesn’t know I exist, you know.”

"Obviously."

“Then why talk about me? He’ll only think you’re…”

"​...crazy. Cerebus knows that."

“But why would you…”

"Lord Julius always said that insanity was the last line of defence for the master bureaucrat."

“I don’t get it.”

"It's hard to get a refund when the salesman is sniffing at your crotch and baying at the moon."

“Oh… I get it now.”

"Insanity is a virtually impregnable gambit... but you have to lay the groundwork early in the game."

— Elf and Cerebus, predicting modern foreign policy

Pixiv: no half measures


Glasses, full-frame and frameless. Kind of like mixing oppai and chippai, which leads to the question, “are pince-nez the loli of eyewear?”

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Dear Unique Pretzel Company,


I approve of your decision to make a larger 16-ounce bag of your delicious Splits pretzels. However, I think perhaps you should have had the graphic design team put a bit more thought into the layout of the bag…

Also, the design for the Rings pretzels always makes me think they’re a LotR tie-in product.

Dear Amazon,


Tell me more about your efforts to prevent price-gouging…

This is for one (1) 1-pound bag of yeast. For comparison, the best price right now is $53.99 for six bags with free shipping, a difference of 22x. The ordinary, non-panic price at King Arthur Flour would be $5.95.

The good news is that between these assholes and eBay, when legitimate suppliers restock, we’re going to have the freshest mail-order pantry goods ever. All the expiring stock will be rotting in their garages.

Unrelated, apparently Good Eats: Reloaded season two starts Monday.

Update

(now that I’ve placed my order…) King Arthur Flour has SAF Gold back in stock for $6.95/pound. Gold is a specialty yeast for high-sugar breads (because sugar sucks up the water that yeast needs), but it works fine for regular breads as well. My existing supply of Red is good for another ~25 loaves, but given the current shipping delays, if things don’t open up again by the end of April, I might need it, if only to share with deserving friends and neighbors.

How does this help?


The sidewalks are pretty empty in my town, with maybe one dog-walker or jogger every six blocks. They’re all wearing masks. Why?

I can understand the homeless guy begging on the street corner, since if he doesn’t have a mask and gloves, no one’s going to want to roll down their window and give him anything, but if there’s no one within a hundred yards during your outdoor rambles, you ain’t spreadin’ or bein’ spread.

(parks and beaches are, of course, closed, because people might choose to get within six feet of each other, even if they came in the same car…)

"They can't solve any problem for you"


Finished my rewatch of Yuuna on the elliptical, and watched the first episode of Bokuben. I was left with a burning question:

Where did they hide the Lovely Angel?

Episode 2 apparently introduces Mughi…

(picture may be related)

3D cheesecake 27: indoor kittens


It turns out my cheesecake archives are surprisingly short on pictures of fully-dressed young women who are clearly inside of a home. Lots of outdoor kittens in bikinis, lots of indoor kittens in lingerie, and vast quantities of kittens in less. I guess it’s a case of au naturel selection.

Unrelated, with apologies to Jimmy Buffett…

🎶 🎶 🎶
Idlin’ the days away in my Coronaville,
  Searchin’ for hydro-oxy-chloroquine.
CNN claims that Orange Man Bad’s to blame,
  But we know … it’s all China’s fault.
🎶 🎶 🎶

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Goin' batsoup crazy...


Too soon, China, too soon:

(via)

Dear Amazon,


While this would provide a cardio workout, I’m pretty sure it’s not a kettlebell, despite being categorized as such:

Likewise, I’m sure chicks dig this, but still, not a kettlebell:

(I was thinking of picking up a pair of nice sandbags for doing Farmer’s Walks, but shipment of exercise equipment has been indefinitely delayed pretty much everywhere; I’ll just have to make do for now by strapping 4-kilo ankle weights to my largest pair of bells)

(By the way, the “sand kettlebells” on Amazon are obvious crap; it’s telling that not a single one of them has any reviews at all. It looks like the best thing on the market is the Rogue Fitness Strongman Throw Bag, which costs more empty than a good 70-pound bell plus shipping)

“Need a clue, take a clue,
 got a clue, leave a clue”