Things I believe…


Moxie Marlinspike…

…is the name of an Ubuntu release, not a human being.

Democrats use illegal immigration…

…to get back the slaves Republicans took away from them.

Speaking of Ubuntu…

…its early success was primarily driven by paid shills in online forums, not by actual satisfied users. It was like that shoddy Chinese knock-off on Amazon that has hundreds of awkwardly-written one-line five-star reviews: “Best Linux ever, very sturdy”, “Crushes ice well, bought three!“, “Matches my drapes!”

Its current success is largely due to unforced errors by its competitors.

Cops shouldn’t carry tasers…

…because they’re barely qualified to use guns, much less choose between multiple options under pressure. If you’ve ever watched them shoot at a public pistol range, you know you’re in more danger standing next to them than in front of the target.

Every human activity should have one person who takes it way too seriously…

…but only one, not an entire sub-reddit full of them.

Cops with military gear…

…should be subject to the UCMJ.

No one at Apple really uses a Mac any more…

…or knows what “QA” means. Also, you’re holding it wrong.

Just as debugging is harder than coding…

…revising is harder than writing new stuff. I don’t want to post more of Virginia’s story until I’ve fixed the bit I got wrong, and I just haven’t had a good block of focus time recently.


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