“When asked to explain what happened, the officer said, ‘I mistakenly thought the trigger was a release for the revolver's cylinder. Thankfully no one was injured.’”
— I Can Haz Accidental Discharge?Dear Japan Airlines,
Do you really think that this is the right time to send out a mailing for a 7-night, $3,375 (plus $90 misc fees, plus $580 extra if you’re not sharing a room with someone) vacation tour package?
Fun with loanwords
In the children’s novel 魔女館へようこそ (“Welcome to the Witch’s Mansion”), casting spells involves cooking. There’s a particular recipe that’s very important to the story, and is printed in full at the end of the book. It took me forty minutes to figure out what it was called.
悪い魔法を封じこめるウ・ア・ラ・ネージュ
For the kanji/kana-challenged, that’s “Warui Mahou o Fuuji-komeru U A Ra Neeju”. The first half is a straightforward prenominal phrase, “…which confines evil magic”, but what is it?
First clue: it’s a dessert recipe.
Second clue: the ingredient list consists of eggs, sugar, cornstarch, milk, and vanilla extract.
Third clue: the recipe requires separating the eggs to make メリンゲ (Meringe) and カスタードソース (Casutaadosoosu).
Fourth clue: the end result involves placing the poached meringe on top of the casutaadosoosu.
Answer below the fold…
Honestly, I think it's some of their best work...
Oh, sure, I make fun of the people who design stage costumes for Hello!Project. It’s the least I can do, given the insane amount of effort they expend to overdecorate their helpless victims.
So when they do something simple, with just two colors and no feathers or tulle or ruffles or rhinestones, I think it’s only fair to say something nice. I mean, it’s even age-appropriate!
Dear Hello!Project Costume Designers,
I realize that Ayumi Shibata and the rest of Melon Kinenbi are being kicked out of the agency along with all of the other adults, but do you really think this is a viable option for her post-H!P career, or did you do it to satisfy certain personal needs?
"Don't bend your belly-button!"
Tuesday night, I managed to scrape together enough time to finish the novel I’ve been reading in Japanese. I was a bit disappointed in the ending, not so much in how the kids defeated the evil witch as in why it worked. But that’s a blog entry for another day.
Tonight, I’m going back through it, looking for the words and phrases that I didn’t find in my pocket dictionary (aka, “DS Lite running Kanji Sonomama”). Some of it I still can’t find (particularly mimetic expressions), but there are some fun ones.
First up, 「へそを曲げる」, which JMdict translates as “to get angry; to become perverse”, but it literally means “to bend your belly-button”. The impudent young warlock who says “heso o mageru na yo, baachan” to the cranky old witch clearly means “calm down, granny”, but since the thing she’s upset about is his lack of respect, it doesn’t really work.
"Oh, by the way..."
Ordinarily, if someone said, “there’s a grill in your office”, I’d consider it a feature.
Don't Throw Me Away
[Another depressing song, this time performed by Yuuko Nakazawa on her debut album. It wasn’t released as a single, so there’s no complete performance on video, but a trimmed version can be found here. The translation is mostly literal, and I’ve tried to preserve the original line breaks rather than rewrite it as smooth English.]
捨てないでよ
“Don’t throw me away”
作詞：つんく 作曲：つんく 編曲：川口 真
(lyrics and music by Tsunku, arrangement by Makoto Kawaguchi)
知らないふり いつもしてる
あなたの他の女性を
I’m always pretending I don’t know about your other women.
ダメな女 苦しいのに
あなたをまた許してる
I’m a hopeless woman. Even though it’s painful, I’m forgiving you again.
今日は帰るの 明日は来るの
ねぇ ひとこと 「ごめん」と
言わせてみたいけど
Are you going home tonight? Will you come back tomorrow? Oh, one single thing, “I’m sorry”, I wish I could make you say it, but…
でも 待ってるばかり
でも 泣いてるの見せない
でも 待ってるばかり
でも 愚痴なんて言わない
Instead, I’m just waiting. Instead, I won’t show you that I’m crying. Instead, I’m just waiting. Instead, I won’t even grumble.
いつかはあなた 好きな女性できても
捨てないでよ
Even if someday you fall in love with someone else, don’t throw me away.
知らないふり いつもしてる
香水の残り香も
I’m always pretending I don’t know, even with the lingering scent of their perfume.
いい女よ 全てそうよ
あなたの邪魔はしない
I’m a good woman, I won’t intrude on everything you do.
明日は来ない 電話もかけない
ねぇ ひとこと「好きだ」と
言わせてみたいだけ
You won’t come over tomorrow, and you won’t call. Oh, one single thing, “I love you”, is all I try to make you say.
でも 待ってるばかり
でも 淋しいと言わない
でも 待ってるばかり
でも 待ってると淋しい
Instead, I’m just waiting. Instead, I won’t say I’m lonely. Instead, I’m just waiting. Instead, when I’m waiting, I’m lonely.
いつかはあなた 好きな女性できても
捨てないでよ
Even if someday you fall in love with someone else, don’t throw me away.
でも 待ってるばかり
でも 泣いてるの見せない
でも 待ってるばかり
でも 愚痴なんて言わない
Instead, I’m just waiting. Instead, I won’t show you that I’m crying. Instead, I’m just waiting. Instead, I won’t even grumble.
いつかはあなた 好きな女性できても
捨てないでよ
捨てないでよ
Even if someday you fall in love with someone else, don’t throw me away. Don’t throw me away.
Mice-Quelling
As a general rule, one does not expect to find that replacing a single server with several significantly faster ones has reduced performance by a factor of four. On reflection, however, perhaps it is inevitable that the word “cluster” must be followed by the word “fuck”.
