“I try to sleep, they’re wide awake, they won’t let me alone. They don’t get paid to take vacations or let me alone. They spy on me, I try to hide, they won’t let me alone. They persecute me, they’re the judge and jury all in one.”

It’s official: on Twitter, disagreement is harassment. Unless you’re disagreeing with those people, of course; then anything goes.

(via, at least until that account gets banned, too)

Denise Matthews is the latest casualty of 2016. Not as politically significant as Antonin Scalia or as beloved as Abe Vigoda, but an important piece of my youth.

(via; as much as I preferred her sexy pics, I’ll leave that for another time out of respect for her beliefs)

[I don’t know who this young whippersnapper who turns up in iTunes searches is, but there will only ever be one Vanity.]

I can’t decide if this picture represents Clinton or Trump tonight. Maybe both.

(via)

Rest in peace, Abe Vigoda.

“Dear 2016, please stop killing off the good ones.”

First I get a phony cruise offer on my cellphone (which has been on the national do-not-call list for years), then I get a call from an annoyed woman asking why I called her cellphone. It seems the cruise-spammer is faking caller-id using the same list of numbers it’s calling.

The polite young black man in a three-piece suit peddling The Watchtower almost didn’t register after that annoyance.

After the events of New Years Eve, future “slutwalks” in Europe are going to look like NRA conventions.

(via)

[Update: …and I posted this picture before the data center flood.]

I know things are getting really busy this holiday season, but please don’t fudge your delivery statistics by claiming that you delivered three packages to my house today. I’ve been here all day, and I know you’re lying about showing up at my house at 8:48pm and leaving them on my front porch.

[Update: they quietly delivered them very early the next morning, so they must have spent the night on the truck.]